Last night, I had a revelation; something that made me realize how mature I am about wanting to be with the right person for me. Let’s call this fellow, The Cheese Guy. Cheese Guy and I meant on Tinder about a month ago. I started up the conversation due to the wall of cheese that was behind him in his profile picture. I was curious, so I decided to say hello. We were making such good conversations, that we exchanged numbers. Long story short, we went on two dates and everything seemed to going better than I ever expected. We both had similar upbringings with an alcoholic parent present, achieving the highest honor for Boy and Girl Scouts, loved the same type of movies and music, and having both goofy and serious sides to our personalities. It had only been a week, but things couldn’t have been better.
And then, Germany won the World Cup and the Stinky Drunk Cheese Guy was out and pride of himself, his actions screamed ‘shame and pity me!’. After the final game was over, the whole I was at his apartment, I kept looking at his roommate, signaling, “What the fuck is wrong with him?”. All he could do was shrug with a confused look on his face. Cheese Boy also wanted to drive while he was drunk and I freaked out on the inside. Something that irresponsible should never have come out of his mouth. I left with him begging for me to stay, but I turned in well before that.
I had decided to let it go and move on; it was the world cup after all and Cheese Guy did live in Germany for a year as a transfer student. I figured it was a one time thing, no real harm done. We hung twice that week and he did apologized to me for his actions and what he said. This past Sunday was a real eye opener. Not only was he drunk, but he also decided to “tell the truth” and talk about the girls he has on the side. I was done; Cheese Guy was growing moldy and more attached by the hour and was 0-2 on being a drunk.
The message I’m trying to leave is this. When a problem does arise, don’t just avoid. If it makes you that uncomfortable to deal with, address the issue like an adult while talking about his and your problems with the matter. But the biggest lesson I learned is this; don’t settle for anyone if they do something that bothers you. I was forced to live with an alcoholic but I don’t have to be around it now. I’m also so grateful that I have a good loving relationship with my mom now, because she is growing, as am I, and she’s becoming a wonderful person. I only wish Cheese Guy felt the same way about his parent.
On a funny note: Please try to make adult choices for your future and don’t settle until you feel it’s right.